Getting Better at Being Social.
7:36:00 PM
Some are born with it, some acquire it; being social isn't everybody's cup of tea. You maybe comfortable hanging out with people of your own mental caliber, but what of the thousands of others with whom you might differ with and have to harmonize with, simultaneously? Being able to make friends out of all the types out there is a must-know, for you'll find your self in need of it some time in your life.
I'm no expert, and am in need of experts myself. But, having gone through complications without having mastered the art of socializing basics, I have reason to believe that I know a little of what it's about. And a little of what you need to do to be able to survive in the outside world where human interaction is involved.
Here I go.
1. Speaking Up.
Something that took me a great deal of focus to hone. I was known as the "quiet guy" and the boy who sits in the corner. It drew all the attention I tried so hard to avoid. I stopped fighting it one day. And spoke up. This was at school. I still am no master of speaking up and letting my ideas be known, but I've come a long way from sitting in corners and avoiding conversation.
This doesn't apply to those who are natural loud-mouths and chatty Kathys; only to those who find it out of their comfort zones to make small-talk, any talk for that matter.
You need to speak up. How will you know who wants to hang out with you and who doesn't if you won't say what you want to? You can look for conversation starters and speech therapists if it's a real bother. But, you need to speak up.
2. Remembering Names.
Again, it may seem easy to a lot of people, but prove to be quite a challenge for some. I thankfully never fell into this category. You get this feeling of satisfaction, when you've memorized person's name and have called them by it once. It is some code; some unspoken agreement stating that you're acquaintances, and can carry on further.
Finding it problematic? Try these cool memorizing tactics to help you out.
People eventually get a hang over names. These strange instructions are for the ones who can't.
3. Hanging Out.
Not being able to hang out with the "other types" is absolutely normal; as long as you have company of your own and don't talk to yourself. However, this sort of kills the purpose of being social. Give it a try. Hang out with whom you normally wouldn't. To keep any awkwardness at bay, start a conversation centered on the other person. This will help. After you've been around the other types all too frequently, they won't notice that you don't belong and you'll be friends for the long haul.
4. Give Your New Friends Time and Thought.
Get to know them better. Give some consideration to what they like to do and talk about. Try to be like them, for the sake of socializing.
5. Be Yourself.
When all of the above has been done, your new friends won't judge you for your eccentricity, if you have any, or anything else for that matter. Be yourself. Let them explore your personality; you gave them a chance, it's your turn now.
They say there is strength in numbers. Surely you're not a fan of being left out and being by yourself all the time.
I'm no expert, and am in need of experts myself. But, having gone through complications without having mastered the art of socializing basics, I have reason to believe that I know a little of what it's about. And a little of what you need to do to be able to survive in the outside world where human interaction is involved.
Here I go.
1. Speaking Up.
Something that took me a great deal of focus to hone. I was known as the "quiet guy" and the boy who sits in the corner. It drew all the attention I tried so hard to avoid. I stopped fighting it one day. And spoke up. This was at school. I still am no master of speaking up and letting my ideas be known, but I've come a long way from sitting in corners and avoiding conversation.
This doesn't apply to those who are natural loud-mouths and chatty Kathys; only to those who find it out of their comfort zones to make small-talk, any talk for that matter.
You need to speak up. How will you know who wants to hang out with you and who doesn't if you won't say what you want to? You can look for conversation starters and speech therapists if it's a real bother. But, you need to speak up.
2. Remembering Names.
Again, it may seem easy to a lot of people, but prove to be quite a challenge for some. I thankfully never fell into this category. You get this feeling of satisfaction, when you've memorized person's name and have called them by it once. It is some code; some unspoken agreement stating that you're acquaintances, and can carry on further.
Finding it problematic? Try these cool memorizing tactics to help you out.
1. Keep a names notebook.
2. Say "hello" to your acquaintance using their name.
3. Say it, like, ten times daily.
People eventually get a hang over names. These strange instructions are for the ones who can't.
3. Hanging Out.
Not being able to hang out with the "other types" is absolutely normal; as long as you have company of your own and don't talk to yourself. However, this sort of kills the purpose of being social. Give it a try. Hang out with whom you normally wouldn't. To keep any awkwardness at bay, start a conversation centered on the other person. This will help. After you've been around the other types all too frequently, they won't notice that you don't belong and you'll be friends for the long haul.
4. Give Your New Friends Time and Thought.
Get to know them better. Give some consideration to what they like to do and talk about. Try to be like them, for the sake of socializing.
5. Be Yourself.
When all of the above has been done, your new friends won't judge you for your eccentricity, if you have any, or anything else for that matter. Be yourself. Let them explore your personality; you gave them a chance, it's your turn now.
They say there is strength in numbers. Surely you're not a fan of being left out and being by yourself all the time.
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